Episode 16

©Miriam Edem

I waited for so long for Godswill but he didn't showed up. I didn't have his number either and i stayed all night wondering what happened not until the next day I heard a horn on the gate and I ran out to meet him,

"What happened to you? I asked touching him as he stepped down. 

"Just leave me alone please, he replied and walked away and I met him inside. 

"Not even a call after you deleted your number from my phone? I asked. 

"Stop wasting your time talking, are your stuff ready for the honeymoon today? He asked. 

"We're still going? I asked but he just hissed and went upstairs. 

I ran to my room and got my things ready, and minutes later we were off to the resort. 

In the car I kept looking at him as he drove but he had an ear pod on,

"Still mad at me? I calmly asked and he looked at me and concentrated on the road. 

"It was a prank, I said and he laughed shaking his head. 

"Believe me, I wanted to make you scared, I continued. 

"You never told me that you're a comedian, he said and I smiled. 

"Because you don't want to know me. Can we stop fighting already? I asked and he breathed out.

'Simple, just do whatever I want without complain, life is so easy can't you see? He asked. 

"Agreed, I said and sidely smiled. 

I thought the resort will be my way of escape. I had already mapped out how i will escape in my head, but alas the guards were following us behind. 

I almost urinated when we arrived and I saw the guards behind us, my shock was so obvious and Godswill just smiled and walked in. 

"Is this man using some of powers to see my head or what? I asked myself as I slowly followed him and saw it risky if I should try anything foolish with the knife I had with me. That was when I began to think of the consequences that will follow my actions, and with that I became very frustrated instantly. 

"Suddenly you look sick why? Godswill asked in the room and I rubbed my forehead. 

"Oh I remember I didn't take my drugs, can I do that now? I lied. 

"We have to eat first. Don't worry breakfast will be here soon, he replied and I nodded. Throughout the one week we had there, I was in my best behavior, very obedient despite it hurts. Godswill threw different test on me which I swallowed up just to be In peace, but where the problem started was our last night there when he wanted having a canal knowledge of me from behind. 

"No you can't do that, I said. 

'You know i can do whatever I want when I want it, he said.

"No please do whatever you want to do with me but not through my anus, I said and he scoffed. 

"I thought we had an agreement? You're wasting my time, he said. 

"I can't! I shouted and ran out from the room with my night gown but met one of the guards standing at the entrance of the door. To make it worst, it was my enemy guard and Godswill came out from the room laughing behind as I paused not knowing where to run to. 

"Bundle her to me, Godswill said and with one hand he threw me on his shoulder back to the room and threw me on the bed. I shook my head crying as Godswill slowly sat on the bed looking at me,

"Its not a good place to punish you and you just proved that you don't want peace. Let's go home first okay, Godswill said smiling and left the room. Yes we have never slept in the same room together and I don't know why either, despite I tried during the honeymoon but I'll find myself alone the next morning.

I felt very disappointed thinking I'll get Godswill during the honeymoon but I failed completely. On the way my mother called and I told her we are on our way Home,

"Ahhhhh Ada, can I visit? She asked and I looked at Godswill.

"Mama you want to visit? Godswill asked. 

"Yes my in law, at least let me leave this mosquito village na and rest small, she replied and I rolled my eyes. I saw real greediness in my mother and she has never asked how am doing but only "how is my in law? Hope you're treating him well bla bla. It is only Luke that asks how am faring, even though I lie with my response but I appreciate the fact that he asks. 

 "Mama don't worry. The house we are staying is actually a new house and things are not really in order, when once the place is completed I'll send for you, is that okay? Godswill asked. 

"My inlaw i trust you na, there is no problem. And I hope you're good? I know my Ada is taking good care of you, she said laughing.

"Ofcourse you taught her well, he replied and looked at me and I looked away. The way he lies so boldly still surprises me, God dey create people sha.

"Okay mama take care of yourself, I said tired with the boring discussion. 

"Bye Ada... And eh eh, she said and I rolled my eyes knowing the discussion is not over yet. 

'Your friends are complaining that you're not picking their calls and you're not returning it back what happened? She asked and I heaved.

"Mama nothing, I replied and she laughed clapping her hands. 

"You better know what You're doing o, I know you are married to a rich man but let it not look as if you've rejected your friends o as long as they are not disturbing you for money, at least let the friendship be there.  Even your pastor saw me the other day and asked about you saying you're not picking his calls, that's unlike you o, she said and I closed my eyes very pained. 

"Mama what do I need them for na? I don't just want anyone disturbance, They should rest abeg and greet brother for me, I said. 

"Hmmmmm Okay madam, she said and I quickly dropped the call and breathed out. 

We arrived home and I left the jeep first to my room and laid down crying. I miss my friends and everybody and anytime they call or send a text I can't pick or reply because of one beast of a Man I got married to. 

The door opened and Godswill walked in which I sat up cleaning my tears,

"You're crying? He asked. 

"Of course I'm crying, I harshly replied.

"Okay let me start by asking you, what exactly happened last night? He asked closing the door behind. 

"You want to hurt me? Go ahead, I replied and took my shoes off. 

"No not yet, at the right time I will and it will pierce through your soul when I strike, he said and I looked at him and he opened the door and left. 

I breathed out and scratched my head very tired with life already, despite I always try to be strong it's not always working, Godswill always knows how to break me.

My pains continued nonstop until it was my 6 months in hell.

One day Nkese came home to make my hair but she noticed I was not looking good,

"Betty, she called out and I cleared my throat. I have been very quiet looking into the mirror ever since she came without talking to her,

"Are you okay? Or is this some kind of pregnancy.... You know? She asked and I smirked. 

Pregnancy ke when different things has taken over the place of my husband in bed. I just cleaned my face and breathed out. If tiredness was a person then it will be me,

"Betty I don't like involving myself in couples issues but I think something is not right here. His late wife before she died was very moody and looked sick, am seeing that in you also, she said and I looked at her. I wanted answering her but tears streamed down my face rather,

"Its okay breathe in alright, Nkese said holding me as she placed my head on her chest.

"I want to leave this marriage, I managed to say to her. 

"Why? What's he doing to you? She asked and I shook my head not knowing where to start. 

"Everything, I don't even want to go into details and you're right, I see myself slowly going to the path of his late wife, I replied. 

"God forbid! Why will you say such a thing? Look at me Betty! She shouted when I just bowed my head and I slowly raised my head. 

"You're not going to die, if you know this marriage is not good for you please leave! Gone are the days when women suffer in silence because of what preachers say like "cherish what you got because if you leave your marriage you will regret. God hates divorce, Pray for your husband and tell God to make him a better person, And you've been doing all of that yet you are gradually going to your grave, Betty leave! Nkese sternly said and I covered my mouth trying to hold back my tears. 

"Its not as easy as you think, am stuck here, I replied. 

"Call your family and tell them this. No right thinking faculty family will force you to remain into something that costs your peace or life, its no do or die affair right? She asked.

"You're right, but sadly I don't have any good thinking family, I'm stuck Nkese and this is something I have to live with. This is my punishment for my choice and whatever will happen in the future I don't know, but if it will give me peace then I accept, I replied and Nkese sadly held my hands and I sniffed. 

'What can i do to help? She asked. 

"Please don't involve yourself, thanks for being a good friend I really appreciate, I replied and she hugged me. 

"Oh dear, I think I'll come back tomorrow to make your hair, you just got me emotional now and it's not good for me, Nkese said. 

"Me too, I'll make it tomorrow am having headache already, I said. 

"Sorry, I think a glass of cold juice will do, let me get it for you, she said and left.............. 

After Nkese Left, I thought about about what she said and decided to talk with Godswill when he comes home. 

That night I boldly entered his room for the first time and touched him on his legs and he jumped up,

"What are you doing here? He asked. 

"Can we talk? I asked.

"No, let it wait till morning, now get out, he replied. 

"Why? Your room is also expensive for me to come in right? or is there a hidden cockroach here that I don't know? I asked and he stood up and held me on my neck,

"I said get out! He shouted and pushed me and I landed my head on the wall. Before Nkese left she washed and weaved my hair, and when I touched my head there was blood. 

I looked at him showing him my blood palm,

'Before you finish me off Godswill, please just let me go. I don't want this marriage anymore I am begging you in the name of God, I said going on my knees and he laughed.

"For better for worst, till death do us part, he quoted.

"I know but there's a chance for divorce right? I asked. 

"I don't do divorce because I respect vows and keep to it. If you want to leave This marriage, there's only one way anyway, he replied. 

"Which is? I asked and he squatted before me.

"Death! He dropped and my eyes bulged out. 

"What? I whispered as tears flowers down.

"Yes, till death do us part! He shouted and stood up. 

"Now get out! He said opening the door for me and I slowly left the room. 

I took the first aid box and treated myself crying. My spirit was weak and broken that I thought of suicide knowing God has finally forsaken and forgotten about me totally. No prayer I prayed worked neither was my tears seen at all, I surrendered all to him when I tried out all the wisdom I thought I had to manage Godswill but it all failed. Will God step in when am in my grave? I wondered as I bandaged where I was bleeding.

That night while sleeping I mistakenly turned and pressed my wound and I woke up. My head was beating like the village drum during the new yam festival. I took a tablet on the table and decided to get water downstairs, but to my utmost shock, there was Godswill having a carnal knowledge with his mother on the sofa naked. 

Jesus! flew out of my mouth and the tablet fell from my hands, but they didn't care neither did they stopped scared I saw them, and I ran back to my room. 

I leaned on the door and let myself slowly to the floor not believing my eyes, what an abomination!


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